Surviving In Hell

I'm still in hell,Remember,Stop judging everything; If you thought that this summer,You'd finally accomplish more,You were expecting too much,Too soon; Besides,All seasons are equal,In their merits; The barriers and obstacles and difficulties,I'm already overcoming,Are immense, It's easy to forget,When you have high standards,Expectations,And optimism, Why does that have to be coupled,With so much rumination? Why … Continue reading Surviving In Hell

Another Perspective

When my plans don't go how I want,It's an opportunity to practice, When it's too late to catch some sun,It's an opportunity to practice, When I lost too much time to rumination and OCD,It's another opportunity to practice; These scenarios become opportunities in themselves,A perfect exposure therapy,In addition to the fact there's more that I … Continue reading Another Perspective

Open Return

Rumination's creeping back in,β€”There we go,If I want a metaphor for the bones-in-back-garden story,That's the thing which I have in the closet,In the bulky sports bag stashed under the bed, And I guess the emotions are quite similarβ€”This gnawing feeling,Twang of dread reigning back any positive emotions,Replacing them with guilt and shame; I just have … Continue reading Open Return

Rammed Full Of Nows

All there is… is the moment-to-moment now,And what I want to do right now,Based on my past experiences,Inclinations,Ideas and plans, Notβ€”"Oh, but I haven't done it yet,so how could I do it now?", "I haven't done it in some ethereal, indefinable yet strongly gut-level order,It's not all part of some well-planned structure,A global masterplan,With full … Continue reading Rammed Full Of Nows

Lifecycle Of Rumination

Rumination…Is like the fate of somebody spiraling into a black hole, At first, you can orbit safely,Moving through a loose cloud of orbital debris,But all of that crap starts to become a drag,As with each looping orbit,You move only faster,Dropping ever-closer and closer… And as your speed increases,So does resistance,You'll fall inwards exponentially faster,Whilst becoming … Continue reading Lifecycle Of Rumination


There is much strength in overcoming rumination,And self-imposed negative mental states; It's difficult to see it from without,Just telling yourself is never enough, You've got to get your brain into a different mode, somehow,With a change of activity, glimpsing another world, But once you snap out of it and comeback to this world,You're all the … Continue reading Respawning

Protoplanetary Disks Of Hope

They say that you can't escape a black hole,That once over the horizon and obscured from light,There is no returning, And whilst the physical laws cannot be broken,Self-imposed laws can,And it's really possible to escape a metaphorical, mental black hole; Mental black holes are created when,Thoughts go round and round in circles,Faster and faster,The fuel … Continue reading Protoplanetary Disks Of Hope