Grain Of Salt

One of these days,
I’m going to purposefully go to the supermarket,
Without my wallet,

Just to take the piss out of the irrational anxiety,
(Which is nevertheless warranted from experience),
Of forgetting to take something with me;

Then when I get there, I’ll go—
“Oh nooo,
I haven’t got my wallet!!”,

“Robin, you daft sod!
How are you going to pay for anything,
Without your wallet!?”,

“You’re going to get caught out one of these days!
Your scooter will break down and you’ll have no money to get a taxi home!!”,

“Oh Robin…
Robin-young-man-Robin-fucking-dickhead-piece-of-shit-disaster-waiting-to-happen,
You’re going to end up in jail,
If you don’t buck your ideas up!!!”.

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Traumatised much?

🌪