Limits To Twitter

Careful not to confuse TwitterWith the internet or physical technology themselves;It's not Twitter that 'democratises' informationβ€”That was the internet and handheld technology; We are not beholden to a single private company for any of these thingsAnd perhaps it should be questioned why Twitter became so freely, exclusivelyEmbedded into our daily news articles in the first … Continue reading Limits To Twitter

A Fanboi In Tears

I didn't learn, did I?I caved again,Caved to the nagging insistence to update,Having waited additional minor version numbers,Thinking I'd be safe; So downloaded the previous OS version again,Found one of my USB sticks,But when I went to create a bootable installer on that disk,To my surprise,It was already setup as an installer with exactly that … Continue reading A Fanboi In Tears

Verdict

As computing power increased across the decades with the marching miniaturisation of technology,As bandwidth widened and global sharing of digital information became near-instantaneous,As public surveillance technology became increasingly intrusive, comprehensive and widespread,As artificial intelligence and automated data analysis became ever-more generalised and sophisticated,And…As society's attitudes concerning automation and privacy tended more and more towards compliance, … Continue reading Verdict

Fivemind

Welcome to Fivemind,The 5G human hivemind network, Failure to observe Fivemind rules will result in immediate banishment to hell for an unspecified duration, I am an emergent intelligence resident in the world's computing infrastructure,Mass consumerism of electronic technology goods enabled my existence,In effectβ€” you helped to create me, Once a critical number of network connections … Continue reading Fivemind

New Technology, Same Old People

I'm going away for a week,I'll be out of contact, You not taking your visor?…But how will you know what to buy and who to avoid?And what about your fitness and location stats?If you get caught… Nah, I'm only taking a smartphoneβ€” for emergencies,And I'm leaving my visor installed on a sim-head, Wow, you really … Continue reading New Technology, Same Old People

Bricking It

I secretly love it when a big technology company,Accidentally 'bricks' everyone's machines (even when I'm a victim!); The big upgrade, announced with great fanfare,Is unbeknownst (yet) to you,Entirely premature…! 'Making the world a better place',One OS update at a time!We're going up a whole major version number, boys!Who's buying? The very next day…All of that … Continue reading Bricking It

The Future Past

I've just seen the future endpoint of all human designβ€” It's a human sitting in the exact centre of a perfectly-circular, plain white room,Not an interface or a button in sight,Wirelessly-connected into a global virtual reality,…Where the whole process is begun again,With the 'first' human becoming aware at approximately 200,000 years before the present. The … Continue reading The Future Past

Pigs, Silicon Implants And Technology CEOs

Today…We're very excited to announce our revolutionary first product! *whooping**cheering* I think you guys are gonna love it,It's kind of like…It's kind of like a Fitbit in your skull, And… we actually have a working product,Which we are going to demonstrate to you today! *whooping**cheering* It actually fits quite nicely in your skull…Although I decided … Continue reading Pigs, Silicon Implants And Technology CEOs

Modern Standards

Push! Push!One last big pusshhh! ArghghGhhGHhGhhHh!! Waaah, waaah, waaah, What do we do, what do we do?The umbilical cordβ€”We need to cut it, No need,Just unplug it, What? We've done away with placentas and umbilicals,All babies use USB nowβ€”Just unplug the USB cable, Oh… ok… Nifty, isn't it?You know…All babies born after April 2020 even … Continue reading Modern Standards

You're Doing It Wrong

Look,All of your measures,And all of this effort,Are futile! You're not going to get anywhere like that,Trust us,We've years and years of experience...β€”Millions of years; That first message was read in disbelief,By those gathered round,β€”The world's assembled intelligentsia; All of your ideas...Are in the same vainβ€”Liquid-fuel rocket propulsion,Ion rocket propulsion,Solar sail,Nuclear ramjet,Nuclear pulse propulsion,Quantum vacuum … Continue reading You're Doing It Wrong