"Buy cheap, buy twice" has always been something I've lived by. I'd rather have something suitable and buy it once or not have it at all. So I should be doing the same when it comes to therapy. Whether or not it proves to be feasible, the options should only ever be: the good quality, … Continue reading Economics Of Empathy
What if they won't believe me,Now that things happen to be cleaner? The new Salvation Army helper,Knows only of the current state of things; Oh, two years of horrendous experiences,Indescribable imagery flashing before my mind's eye,All I can offer is examples,Struggling to form the sentences…How can you describe that? What if they won't believe me,Now … Continue reading House Of Horrors
I've been struggling a lot lately with OCD and motivation. It's been a while since I was able to get beyond the basic tasks in a day and do extra things I wanted to do. Developments: My Salvation Army support person is changing. This is a good thing as although the previous one meant well, … Continue reading A New Court Date And Another Viewing
I don't see an idealised version of the environment around me,I see, hear, smell, feel,All of the imperfections and disjointedness,Which distinguish it from a smoothly-flowing, remote location in the outdoors,Where everything is logical and has a place; Nobody ever desired to breathe in the heated up glossy paint off the surface of a radiator,Or to … Continue reading Sensory Cues
Yesterday my Salvation Army support person turned up with three presents from a nearby school. I assumed they were boxes of chocolate and was considering just adding them to the donations pile at Tesco because of the fact I'm really sensitive to changing my diet at the moment and wary of anything upsetting the delicate … Continue reading Serotonin Sensitivity!
Sometimes, when I see something so disgusting,I can't stop bringing it back to mind,Nor do anything else,Until I've found the 'right' way to reconcile this with the world; In fact, now I remember writing about this on here before;Anyway, there are times in survival mode I am able to numb myself to such things,Other times … Continue reading Erasure Of Disgust
The irony; I sometimes wonder…If the easy and open way in which I talk about my mental health struggles,The blunt, curated insight I have into them,The clarity of my mental list of steps to tackle them… Does it ever come across as disarming or evendisingenuous,To people who live outside in the world with all the … Continue reading The Irony!
I want to do what I canTo help people in abuse situationsAnd raise awarenessOf the signs Because the most important signs are so obvious to some peopleAnd not to others;We need to do all we canTo get everybody on the same page; There's nothing that hurts me more…Than seeing somebody else in that kind of … Continue reading Emotional Intuition And Sensitivity
I feel the wallsclosing inagainHuman stampedesup and downthe hallwayDisrupting me fromthe final outletThe endless universeof writing and creativityThe laststrandof proactive hopeSaving me, fromthe abyssal void of empty days without a planFor this activeproactiverestless mindThat is the truest hellThere is nothing l o n g e rthane m p t y timeWith no beginningand no e … Continue reading Closing In Again
How am I the first to invent this word or at least to type it intentionally on the internet? Only 963 search results, all of them porn; Make of that what you will about how it reflects on literacy standards in the porn industry; But, in fact sadomachoism is an apt word for the concept … Continue reading Sadomachoism