Her Presence Is Real

She's so worth itDeserves everythingEverything good to happen Shows so much courageShe keeps tryingIn a relentlessly-hostile world; I believe in good thingsGood peopleAnd good things happening Somehow, somewhenLonger-termThings can change; She has the honestyIs rightfully indignantKnowing the truth within herself Many qualities which give me hope. 🌪

Still Very Much Alive

The country is not ruinedDemocracy is not deadEven though it's not as representative as it could beBecause they are not all the sameAnd people do go into politics to make a positive differenceIt's just a matter of voting for themIncluding (or especially) the ones who stand for electoral reform; What does defeat a countryAnd kill … Continue reading Still Very Much Alive →

Dare To Hope

Daringtohope… Whilsttryingnot to; Could itreallyhappen…this time? I've collected 8 documents in support of my need for my own place— from charities who've helped me, a GP, a community mental health nurse and a psychiatrist (my autism and OCD diagnosis reports). It is in the council's hands now, as they have done another 'homelessness risk assessment' … Continue reading Dare To Hope →

Life’s Colours

Turning at last towards the Sun,Volcanoes wept,Mountain chains stood, Terminator swept across frozen oceans,Glaciers retreated,Rivers dared to run once more; Stuck in the darkness,Angular momentum stolen,The long night of a slowly-spinning world must come to an end; Life endured as steppes became plains,Oceans chocka',Birds enjoyed the rains. 🌪

Some Progress

Typed upfull incident log,Printed outtwo copies,Samaritans chatted to me in my room, Fuck yes, they were really nice,Supportive,Non-dismissive,Marked down'Condition of tenant's room'as'Excellent',"Like being in a spa"they said,"Keep it like this"they said,bathed in lavender;"Are these plants real?","Yes of course they fucking are 😂"; Next daypolice called,Went throughthe landlord 'assault' incident in detail, They dismissed all the … Continue reading Some Progress →

The Hidden Achievement

A year ago, I used to say to myself—I survived the seven months in the car,Survived countless low-points and bottlenecks to survival,I'm awesome, man, And take comfort from that when feeling anxious,When feeling scared to walk around the supermarket,Caught up in anxious OCD rituals and feeling very self-conscious; It's easy to do so when there's … Continue reading The Hidden Achievement →

Open Return

Rumination's creeping back in,—There we go,If I want a metaphor for the bones-in-back-garden story,That's the thing which I have in the closet,In the bulky sports bag stashed under the bed, And I guess the emotions are quite similar—This gnawing feeling,Twang of dread reigning back any positive emotions,Replacing them with guilt and shame; I just have … Continue reading Open Return →

Dayum, Dayum, Dayum

Dayum,I lost so much, didn't I?Relative to the start of the year, With all of the stresses of the housing environment,No control over being able to do the daily tasks I needed to,Losing my ability to write how I wanted to,Losing my ability to want to write or to daydream,—All of this I was fully … Continue reading Dayum, Dayum, Dayum →

Mental Health Spaces

Well…I've finished my project,Of becoming self-sufficient,—I no longer need anything from the house,Except resupplies of water; Once every few days, I undertake a lonely voyage,Walking the long path through wastelands, aghast,(to the kitchen/bathroom),Carrying my empty jugs; The mental health benefits, so far,Have been enormous!I no longer care about the state of the house,—It's none of … Continue reading Mental Health Spaces →

Result Of The Autism Assessment

I finally had the video call on Monday,After completing the seventeen-page questionnaire… That questionnaire was never-ending,And I had a lot to say,With no problem with writing… 😉; Writing is one of my crazy strengths,Contrasting with more basic things which I can struggle with;This kind of 'spiky skill profile',Can be characteristic of autism, And the psychiatrist … Continue reading Result Of The Autism Assessment →