Technical Service Bulletin: NON-OFFICIAL

Please be aware that in order to ensure compliance with the upcoming 5G switch-on, All carriers are advised to immediately switch over to the alternate frequency band for aircraft radio altimetry. β€œThe presence of 5G C-band interference can result in degraded deceleration performance, increased landing distance and runway excursion” β€œThe presence of radio altimetry C-band … Continue reading Technical Service Bulletin: NON-OFFICIAL

No More Words

It was funny how even now, not much had changed;Funny, terrifying, surreal,It would be hard to sum it up in words,Complex emotions we'd never expected to feel;All the same, at some fundamental level we'd remained blissfully, wilfully unaware,These final few months; As the sky began to blot out,The darkening, growing shadow falling across the upper … Continue reading No More Words

The Sheltering 2

Who knew if we would find survivors,This long after the Fall,We'd suffered losses over the years,And all longed for new human connections, What we lacked in medical expertise we made up for in engineering ability,But we needed to diversify,…And we were simply curious; It was a long, long shot in the dark,Attempting to connect the … Continue reading The Sheltering 2

Up On The Gallows: PART 2

Could you guys make room for a third up there?That's it…shuffle along! (Can I just grab an extra stool, please? Thanks),Just plop yourself on there…that's it; Rightβ€” any last words!?Landlord, you first… I…I…n-n-need to m-m-make a phone call! And who would you like to call? The c-c-council! Ok…it's ringing and on speaker… He's growing weed! … Continue reading Up On The Gallows: PART 2

Insidiously Dark Humour/Just Biden Time

What did I say, D**ald!?I told you to stop going out…I said you'd catch that China Plagueℒ️,Didn't I!? Goddamnit…—When do you think he'll wake up, Dr.? …Who? My son!!D**ald!! Oh, er…I don't think he was ever woke,To be completely honest with you,Mrs. Tr**p, Are you taking the piss!!?? NOoo… You're doing everything you can,Right!!?? …YEeah… … Continue reading Insidiously Dark Humour/Just Biden Time

Old Man Quantum

I've been universing for 13.8 billion years…So don't you give me any of that shit,I know what I'm talking about! I may currently just be a collection of carbon molecules,Themselves made up of atoms,Sub-atomic particles,Sub-sub-atomic particles,All strung together with light,And other bosons, But I know a degenerate Bose-Einsteinian foolΒΉ when I see one! ΒΉ 'Einsteinian … Continue reading Old Man Quantum

Criminally-Offensive Sounds

Your condition, please? Iβ€” uhh…I've been diagnosed with slocking, Your ticket number is 23671,Please take a hood and noose and join the line on the left,Sir… Okay,Thank you; Hey… uhh,Excuse meβ€”Am I in the correct line? Heya, buddy,Let's see your certificateβ€”I see…Unfortunately, yes,You're in the correct line,β€”Good luck, man! 'Unfortunately'?'Good luck'?What… Bro… TICKET NUMBER 23671,PLEASE … Continue reading Criminally-Offensive Sounds

Major Trauma/Journey Through The Emergency Department

Doctor, doctor,My legs have fallen off! PSCCCHH!Salus two-one,We're bringing in a code blue Joe, code blue Joe,Over! PSCCCHH!Copy that, Salus,Code blue Joe!You may land on any runwayβ€”Uhh, I mean…Any ambulance space… yeahβ€” Big Bird Blue,Get off the damn airways,Over!! We need to stem the bleeding,He's going into cardiac arrest! Stand by…Clear! I feel a pulseβ€” … Continue reading Major Trauma/Journey Through The Emergency Department

The Most Annoying Dad

Brace yourselves, kids,I've got bad news,β€”I think I may have coronavirus; 😨,Oh, no… Dad!How are you feeling? Not too bad at the moment,Don't worry,I'm going to confine myself to the study for the next three days,Just as a preliminary precaution;Now, I've done some calculations,And we should have enough supplies to last us for… 1,236 days. … Continue reading The Most Annoying Dad