For. Fuck’s. Sake

I sometimes write creatively perhaps in a way which isn't always immediately obvious, especially when partially-inspired by personal experiences. I enjoy writing in first-person with a subtly-satirical style. Please read tags if unsure! I came out here for some peace and quietWhich was going just fine, untilThat Mr. Musk moved in next door Now even … Continue reading For. Fuck’s. Sake →

Meltdown 2

Starmer, StarmerToo good for solid matter Starmer, StarmerCannot keep his own atoms together Labour build a StarMOATAs Sir Kier turns to literal jelly; And he stood, glass in hand,In the middle of the House of Commons,Gloating over the deconstituted Leader of the Opposition,And downed a pint of Starmer, And we realised,That the culture war, media … Continue reading Meltdown 2 →

Meltdown

Wait for the reportWait for the police investigationWait for the warWait for the local electionWait for the reportWait for the jubileeWait for the vote of no-confidenceWait for the by-electionWait for the second vote of no-confidenceWait for the general electionWait for the monkeypox outbreakWait for the droughtWait for the floodWait for the famine They needed another … Continue reading Meltdown →

Not The Right Type Of Vulnerable

Are you suffering physical abuse?No Are you suffering sexual abuse?No Do you have problems with drugs or addiction?No Then I'm afraid we can't help you. The fuck? PTSD,Emotional abuse,Invisible physical disabilities,Suicidal thoughts,Self-harm,Autism,OCD, All examples of things which don't make you the right type of vulnerable. It's ok, though,Because there are private rented accommodations,However being in … Continue reading Not The Right Type Of Vulnerable →

Honorary Membership

We questioned why we'd need to be a part of their defence pact, when hitherto we'd known nothing of aliens. They convinced us that we were soon to cross a threshold of coming onto the radar of advanced civilisations across the galaxy (including the nefarious ones). To sweeten the deal they offered us something we … Continue reading Honorary Membership →

All Bathed In The Blue Lights Of Progress

The flashing blues are out in force againTangible signs of background tension Usually hidden from the eyes of the currently-healthyThe warning signs are thereTo those paying attention; So the grand experiment beginsHas in fact already begunNo restrictions, no mandated isolationNo masksNo personal responsibility The whims of the masses go with the flowWhen it suitsSo despite … Continue reading All Bathed In The Blue Lights Of Progress →

Into The Red And Back

Such is the convoluted and peculiar nature of it… There are decades where nothing happens,And weeks where decades happen, Just as there are vast swathes of country where nothing happens,And singular locations where a country's worth of history happens; Nobody asked for simultaneous global events,Successive disasters casting the previous into new perspectives,But this exquisite geographical … Continue reading Into The Red And Back →

Neighbour From Hell

Like the supermarket trolleys lining the ditches of slip roads into concrete junglesOr Audis and BMWs scattered down mountainsides of the Scottish HighlandsKarma for the presumptuousness of personal satisfactionAnd over-confidence in oneself All roads lead to pain and ruinAnd a flat tyre along the wayEven if you're driving a ten-year-old SkodaLiving a perfect, modest moral … Continue reading Neighbour From Hell →

Self-Impotence

The righthonourablememberStood toattentionAnd spewedforthAbsolutelynothing ofsubstancebutA veritablethick streamOf Satan's ownspawnand lies.🤢 🌪

Order of the Supreme Court: SMITH vs. STATE

TheparticularvaccinatedpassengerindividualWas extractedfrom theaircraftAnd subjectedto teststo determinesusceptibilityto systematic5G microwavecoercionIt wasdetermined thatdespite beingtriple-vaccinatedAnd upon beingadministeredwith a furtherbooster shotTheparticularpassengerindividualIs immune toEnhanced 5GQuantum-PhaseSuperpositionalControlIt isthereforetheunanimousjudgementof thiscourtAnd in thepublicinterestThat theparticularvaccinatedpassengerindividualShall befucking shot. 🌪