Mr Speaker he stole my pocket money and shared it out amongst his mates!! Mr Speaker during the first lockdown he breathed on me and said haha you've got covid!! Mr Speaker whenever I offer him a sweet he always grabs a handful, but never shares any in return! Mr Speakerβ¦Mr Speakerβ¦Mr Speaker I am … Continue reading Tell Him Off!!
Category: Silly
Feeling It
Today I feelβ¦fermionI feelβ¦bosonI feelβ¦quantum-entangled with particles of all compositionsI feelβ¦spooky action at a distanceI feelβ¦multi-dimensional Grandad's off on one again! I feelβ¦migrant workerI feelβ¦I know what it's like. We need a new universe. πͺ
Prime Minischnau
Elle va dans les annales de l'histoireEt dans l'histoire des animauxComme la premiΓ¨re chienne schnauzer naine femelleQui a atteinte la position de Prime MinischnauEt servi pour deux termes cΓ©lΓ¨bres et mΓ©morables. She goes down in the annals of historyAnd in the history of animalsAs the first female mini schnauzer dogTo have reached the position of … Continue reading Prime Minischnau
Her Legacy Is Cuteness
Leeeetle MeeesteeeI want to kiss her on the noseBut I can'tCos she ded π But her cuteness remains in my brainSending me oxytocins from beyond the brane She knew what she was doingThe little bitch (what it's not swearing!)Over-the-topCuteness overloadHow powerful her allure. Now scratch my belly! π I am sure that the ghost of … Continue reading Her Legacy Is Cuteness
Why You So Small!? πβπ¦Ί
Little MistyWhat are you doingBeing so small? I can't believe she was so smallWhenever I went to visit herShe was smaller than the last time I guess up-closeShe looked bigger whilst nosing herNosing her endlesslyOn her little black nose Why was she so small?Wagging her tail and flapping her earsSquealing in excitementTo see her "favourite" … Continue reading Why You So Small!? πβπ¦Ί
The Influencer’s Prayer
Let us give thanksFor our daily stimulationAnd remember our LordWho suffered judgement, persecution and cancellationSacrificing his eternal privacyFor our everlasting sanctity from boredom In the name of our LordWe like, share and subscribe Like, share and subscribe Entertaining Of The 5,000 His followers answered: "Where could we get enough content to entertain such a crowd?" … Continue reading The Influencer’s Prayer
Licensed To Party
What a fascinating spectacleβ¦How to define in lawA social occasion? Can you defend your gatheringWas it a partyWas it a dinnerWas it a work meetingDid you play Hungry Hippos? When does a meetingBecome a partyAnd when does a partyBecome a meetingTherein lies the built-in, implicit needFor discretion and subjective judgement But that doesn't hold up … Continue reading Licensed To Party
STOAT
If you find that you're not the GOATYou may be the STOAT;StretchiestTrousersOf All Time. Photo by sour moha on Unsplash Who's wearing the trousers in this relationship? β¦Stretchy or not? You either die a GOAT π,Or you live long enough to see yourself become the STOAT π. Bleeehhhhhβ πͺ
Reductio Ad Absurdum
There weren't any parties I didn't attend any parties It was a work meeting I was only there for twenty minutes I was boosting team morale I only had one drink Nobody told me I was drunk It wasn't a birthday party That's not music I've never had a birthday Nobody told me it was … Continue reading Reductio Ad Absurdum
Special Cuteness Of Misty πβπ¦Ί
You naughty dog you're too cute,You're not allowed to be that cute,There's a universal limit to cuteness, Like the speed of light,The cuteness of Mistyβ’οΈ, If you spend too long near to the cuteness of Misty relative to an inertial cuteness frame,Once you return to the reference frame of the observer,Everything will be all ugly … Continue reading Special Cuteness Of Misty πβπ¦Ί
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