Mental Black Hole

I've been caught in a mental black hole,Routine collapsing into singularity, A singularity of singularly circular thinking,(Sorry), Where time and space are ripped from existence,And I am both dead and alive at the same time, Where I exist separately to baryonic matter,Shielded by an event horizon of twisted thoughts; Black holes are where information goes … Continue reading Mental Black Hole

Mental Health Impacts Consolidated

My housemates,Are wearing me down, It becomes very difficult,To get out of bed,When I want to get moving quickly,But that's always when one of them is in the kitchen; Being around any of them,Triggers an instant anger response,At their relentless selfishness,And communal apathy, That's besides the alcoholism,Smoking,Arrogant breaking of lockdown,Everything; I'm trying to get back … Continue reading Mental Health Impacts Consolidated

Zombie In The Corner

As I'm busy in the kitchen,Doing my cooking,There stands a dark figure,In the corner of my eye; The door has opened,A wraith has appeared,And it catches me by surprise,Every time; It startles me,And makes me jump,For being around this housemate,Is no joke; The stink of smoke and drink,Are always strong,And as they go out to … Continue reading Zombie In The Corner

Booing Doing Wooing

I'm gunna start now, ... No, not really. I'm gunna start now, ... ... Nah...not yet! Come on, third time lucky,This is the discontinuity,The distinguishing moment that I neededβ€”Starting......NOOOOOWWWW πŸ₯³ ... ... ... F**k's sake...I am f***d,I'm f***ed...I'm f***ed, ... ... ... ... ... ... Oh look, I started!I've been doing!I AM doing! ... And … Continue reading Booing Doing Wooing

It’s Always Possible To Move Forwards πŸ’™

What I love,Is that it's always possible to go forwards, It's always possible to put the past behind you,And to start doing the things you wanted to now, β€”If you're healthy enough to, that is,And if you're not,β€”It's a chance, or an excuse,To be easier on yourself; Whether that thing is having a shower,Battling with … Continue reading It’s Always Possible To Move Forwards πŸ’™

Not A Supernova, But A Panic Attack

I've just been hit with a huge revelation,Another of these momentous occasions, It's a real turning point in self-explanation,Along with ADHD, OCD and autismβ€” I do know what panic attacks are,And I do experience them,β€”This has been a mystery,Discrepancy,Which has long confused me... "A panic attack is the abrupt onset of intense fear or discomfort … Continue reading Not A Supernova, But A Panic Attack

Back In Sertraline

Those light-headed spells,Unsteadiness on my feet, Those were withdrawal effects,From Sertraline; β€”I did a classic Robin thing,Waited 'til it ran out,Then took my prescription out...But it wasn't for Sertraline, It was for Dermol and Epaderm,The b***ards; I'd remembered it wrong,Yet also half-right,So I got to the day,And inavoidably ran out, How are so many words,Not … Continue reading Back In Sertraline

Looping And In Pain

I've been lying in bed,Stuck in looping mental routines, I actually slept all day,Yesterday,β€”I've not done that before,In my life; But I'd been awake all night,Excited about,The misophonia thing,And learning more about it; β€”Also, simply enjoying,The continuing blessed silence,For I have no idea,How long it'll continue; Ultimately, though,I've barely been outside in months,Since I have … Continue reading Looping And In Pain

Conservation Of Adversity

My last thought of the dayβ€”Conversation of adversity; For I theorise a personal law,Which states, simply: "For every good fortune,There is an equal and opposite,Misfortune"; What does this mean,In practice? It means,That today was not all rosy,Because there's also something a bit nastyβ€” Confirmation,That I'll have to pay,For a parking ticket each day...For at least … Continue reading Conservation Of Adversity