OCD rituals
With implied state
Are the worst
That’s what’s gripped me the last year and a half
It stopped being fun
There was no relief in writing about anything
Because the state would remain ‘imperfect’
Regardless of what I did in-between
And now I feel self-conscious again
People reading what I write
Certain people whom I’d rather they not read
And I don’t want them thinking I’m ok or not ok
Or have any kind of opinions
But the genie is out of the bottle now
Pandora’s box is opened
The worms are a-wriggling
And it’s maggots all the way down.
Rather than focusing on whom I don’t want reading it, I should focus again on whom I do want reading it, whom did read it and whom benefitted from itβ the community of people I do want to associate with.
‘Whom’ is like another pandora’s boxβ once you’re aware of its usefulness it’s hard to go back, even if sometimes it makes you wince to type it.
πͺ
π»πππππ
π πΆπ πͺππππ πͺ 
It sounds like it’s difficult place to be….being self conscious of either way..did I understand this post right? Now I am questioning myself.
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I too worry about certain individuals reading my blog. When I write things I wonder about they’re going to think. Which is kinda weird when you think about it.
You’ve set up a real conundrum with that “whom” thing– “I should focus again on whom I do want reading it, whom did read it and whom benefitted from it.” It sounds awkward but I can’t figure out why. Usually to figure out who vs whom I reorder the sentence in my head using he or him. So we wouldn’t say “him is reading it,” we’d say “he is reading it.” But you’ve got a preposition which calls for “whom.” “Whom benefitted from it.” If we substituted he/him, we’d get “he benefitted” vs “him benefitted.” So I’d say use “who.” But that preposition “on” is throwing me… I think this is one of those cases where some construction is implied.. This could go on all night.
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“Whom I do want reading it” makes sense because if it’s him you’d say “I do want him reading it.” That damn “whom did read it…”
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Wait I think I’m figuring it out! “Whom did read it” is like a separate chunk that you’re focusing on. So in reality it’s “I should focus on [who did read it].” The phrase is its own thing all together. I think? Does that make sense?
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I think you’re almost there! It’s about what is the subject vs. the object of a sentence. In my examples the subject is ‘reading my blog’ and the ‘whom’ is referring to a person (object) that might be reading it. I’m not asking ‘Who is reading?’ my blog, but I know who the whom is and the sentence is about the act of them reading it. In ‘Who is reading?’ the subject is not the reading itself but wanting to know who is doing the action. I think you pretty much got it.
https://www.grammarly.com/blog/who-vs-whom-its-not-as-complicated-as-you-might-think/
On the other hand I just read the very obvious point that ‘whom’ is formal English (so it’s accepted and mostly unambiguous to just use ‘who’ in informal writing), hence why it makes me uncomfortable so I’ll probably just ignore it now on my blog anyway :D.
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I’m so stressed out about this π
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Oh no! Letβs just make a pact to use who everytime π
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But I like whom! It makes me feel important!
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Yeah I read that ‘him her/he she’ rule too and I think it’s too simplistic, just confused me, which is why the subject/object stuff is the thing to focus on rather than the words.
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Ocd rituals…..those two words have been the main reason I am on my little writing break. I may be all the way across the world but I do understand what your going through RoBIN.
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