A Sense Of Foreboding πŸ˜

Uhhh my Universal Credit commitments have randomly changed to expecting me to look for work, coinciding (coincidentally) with having a different, male* work coach for my next appointment. I have a task in my Todo List asking me to ‘accept the commitments agreed with my work coach’.

I’ve just written a message saying that the commitments weren’t agreed in my last appointmentβ€” no changes were discussed with my usual work coach, and I’ve returned the Work Capability Assessment form yesterday by recorded delivery.

Umm is this the beginning of a saga similar to those nightmare stories the benefits advisor kept describing? The timing would be just about rightβ€” I’ve finally got the stable, suitable accommodation and I’ve just started seeing a therapist yesterday. A new hurdle would just be perfect :).

Such a hurdle could’ve easily happened at any time I was living in the shared hell house, too. Imagine that. I am just concerned about the fact that when I asked for the extension to the deadline for the Work Capability Assessment form, no new date was ever given in writing, but I was always keeping the work coach in the loop about my doctor requesting medical records etc. In the end, the doctor went on holiday for three weeks and I gave up on hoping for anything. I managed to collect medical documents sent from home and the ones that I had.

I could’ve sent the form back sooner if not for the crippling levels of OCD I’ve suffered lately. The last week has been much more productive as I have used the upcoming therapy sessions as extra motivation in applying Exposure and Response Prevention strategies to improve the OCD symptoms.

Hopefully I am just needlessly preparing myself for a worst-case scenario!


*in these three years of dealing with Universal Credit I have lucked out with all three work coaches being female and sympathetic (even empathetic), and even the interim ones I saw (when the usual coach was away) were female. I mention this because whilst some of my most traumatic experiences have involved female antagonisers, they have more often been men and it’s well-known that women are statistically more empathetic, which is empirically the case for me. We all know this. So, I always choose female therapists for example. No surprise I probably have additional bias due to the most antagonistic of my parents being the male one, haha.

Interestingly after retaking a Myers-Briggs personality test this week I have been relabelled from Campaigner to Protagonist :D.

πŸŒͺ

2 thoughts on “A Sense Of Foreboding πŸ˜

  1. It seems like some people are just destined to have one hurdle after another thrown into their paths. As for the other thing, the gender dynamic–in my case it’s always a toss up. Sometimes women doctors and therapists are meaner to women because if you don’t want to the play the game they way they do, they get really mad. Sometimes men are caring, other times dismissive and impatient.

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