What’s The Worst That Could Happen? 🤔

My heart’s fine,
My health is fine,
And after all…
What’s the worst that could happen?

I could drop dead tomorrow,
Or even now,
And would that be so bad?

I wouldn’t have to bear the aftermath,
It would probably be quick and painless,
And it would immediately end the last few years of struggle;

Anxiety’s felt in the heart,
So anxiety about the heart only tends to increase the very symptoms being worried about,
Whilst the best alleviator of those symptoms is to stop worrying,
And cease compulsions;
Yet, to cease worrying without action creates an initial surge of worry and discontent which derails the logical plan of action as it’s begun;

When listening to or reading descriptions of physical injury or ailments,
I cannot help but feel those symptoms in my own body to some extent,
Which is a useful tool but sometimes becomes unbearable;

So as I found myself hearing briefly about partially-clogged arteries,
So my attention immediately turned inward to the uncomfortable phantom physical sensations,
Whilst mentally reviewing my own life choices which contributed to the physical state in which I find myself now,

Which, as it turns out (and thankfully so)…
Is passable!

Besides that, I place no intrinsic value in my physical self,
Only in the actions that I take and how they can affect the world and how I am feeling;
Risk to myself is weighed in lost opportunities to do future good things,
Or in negative effects on those left behind;

As far as I’m concerned I already relinquished my atoms to the universe,
So fuck ’em all! 😛

🌪