Intercision

What to do,
When family is stalking you?
When after too much trauma,
You cannot hear from them?

When you don’t want to share anymore of yourself,
Even when it’s passive,
Via observing your creations;

Damn, damn, damn;

I tried to cut the contact,
Cut it cleanly,
To separate myself,
From that external dæmon,

“Intercision was the process by which a human was separated from their dæmon. The severe trauma this caused usually precipitated death for that person, but, with certain techniques and precautions, it was possible for someone whose dæmon had been cut away to remain alive.”,

Intercision was what I was going for,
But not merely to survive,
—Rather,
In the absence of a clean intercision,
Merely surviving is a potential outcome;

“…the request needs to be made with more social graces otherwise I might start to feel like i’m being financially and emotionally abused”,

“He found it (the blog) but isn’t reading it out of respect”,

Problem— they never respected nor understood me,
So that’s not working!
Alas, alas,
So the analytics tell me;

“…it’s not an issue right now and I don’t feel particularly abused.”;

Through and through,
Never a word of empathy,
No comprehension,
Of the nightmares that I’ve survived…narrowly;

There is no disrespect in anything I say,
For I will never, ever give more of my energy to them,
Barebones wording, the absolute minimums,
As necessities dictate,
As a matter of survival,

Yet… what minimal contact I do have to make,
Inevitably fills me with more and more dread;

Do you know a scary thing?
Within an hour of speaking to any sensitive/empathetic person,
(Pick any you like, any will do!),
—They, at that point,
Know me better than close family do (besides Toby);
—They, at that point,
Have offered me more comfort than my family ever have;

So what to do,
When family is stalking you?

They’re reading my blog,
They’re hearing my podcast,
Subscribing on youtube,
Clogging my spam filters;

When I’d thought I’d successfully severed that connection,
I was out on my own,
My spirit was reborn;

I’m going to have to find a way to deal with this,
For it’s clear to me they’ll never respect anything I say;
It’s been this way for as long as I can remember,
And I know it’ll never change;

They lack an ability for introspection and improvement,
They lack the focus which I place on integrity,

—Two fundamental principles which I’ve always lived by,
My reaction to the trauma,
And which I hold sacrosanct;

But as long as I continue to—
I can’t go wrong, right?

🌪