Urge For Control

This urge for control,
Of how my time is used,
Of maximising opportunities for things,
Is really quite funny and absurd;

It was rightly pointed out,
As a surprising quirk,
Given my propensity for rationality and intuition,
With all matters significant;

But, it can be broken,
Through patience and practise,
If I can free myself from that urge for control of that one specific thing,
I can get a long way;

And it’s nice, after stressing about it for a while,
To see through the noise,
And see it for what it is,
To lean into the day,
With each moment its own,

To allow my rational brain to come through,
And propensity for appreciation to shine,
For they are there, as natural traits,
But the irrational obsessions become too strong,

I can do it, though,
And it would be so freeing!

I do think, that,
Replacing the obsessions with deliberate, practised appreciation,
Is a strong tool,
Along with the others;

That makes me a martyr,
For resisting OCD,
But I’ll have to take the emotional hit,
In the name of rationality 😉.

🌪