I need to produce a masterpiece,
To ‘make up’ for all of the struggles,
And lost times :P,
No not really,
But I need to write something nice, now;
βI woke up from extended nightmares,
About undiscovered parking tickets,
And criticism from my dad,
Having to ask for money,
And defend myself again,
Whilst protecting myself,
From worsening rumination;
I screamed, repeatedly,
βWhilst picking up envelopes in the hallway,
Which my housemates heard,
And judged,
βIn frustration at my dad,
For his misunderstanding,
Lack of empathy,
And taunting,
Whilst already hurting;
Now I’m listening to ‘Peaceful Piano’,
Through my headphones,
Which blocks out the noise of creaking floorboards,
And crushing of baby’s skulls;
It doesn’t, really,
Not unless I turn the volume right up;
And it doesn’t matter, what time I get up,
βMy nerves are jangled, by this incessant noise!
But never mind,
βFor although the nightmares,
Got me overthinking,
And ruminating,
And ritualising,
I’ve remembered the golden rule:
Nothing worth repeating,
Is ever worth it,
Ever!
And simply the more I believe and practice that,
The easier,
It will get!
It’s a wonderful feeling to be free!
πͺ
π»πππππ
π πΆπ πͺππππ πͺ 
Valerian is good for the nerves, I make a tea with the roots or you can buy it in capsule form at the herbalist. If you have not tried this, it may help
https://puzzlesofthesoul.com/2018/02/09/valerian-trial/
https://puzzlesofthesoul.com/2018/03/23/valerian-2/
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Thanks so much! I’m usually hesitant to investigate these things because of money issues, and because I’ve had so many suggestions over time, that if I was going to spare extra money on any of them, it’s impossible to have any perspective on which to start researching.
But I just looked into this and it looks very promising! I can get some nearby from an Asdaβ I’m going to get some as soon as it’s open! π thank you. If it helps I’ll probably get some in root form like you.
I’ll let you know how it goes π.
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You’ve opened my mind though and since I’ve freed up a lot of time for myself, I’m definitely going to learn more about natural anxiety solutions. Would be great to get off the antidepressants.
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I got the valerian tablets by the way! (Kalms Day). I’ve taken 2 doses today, and will take 3 more tomorrow.
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I’m really feeling a lot better now! I’ve been avoiding the tics a lot today, and I’ve stayed busy and free of ruminating for most of the day, writing and interacting with people on here a lot.
I don’t know how much is all of that and how much is perhaps the new tabletsβ but everything together is making me feel much better! π I do feel like they must be contributing right now.
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Pleased to hear you are feeling better
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Thank you! π
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